PART 3 OF 3...
We are constantly looking for love. ♥️ We try and try again. Sometimes we meet someone and it’s that classic “This is the one.” We grow together, build a life. If we are healthy and resolved, we are committed and happy. Sometimes. Healthy people make healthy relationships.☝🏽
But sometimes, there can exist a feeling of discontent. 👀 Growing pains perhaps. In my case, my best friend would tell me he IS showing you his love. In his way. I didn’t understand what that meant. I wished for this, and I wished for that. And often those wishes appear to be born from what lacks in the relationship.
What if they are not? 🤷🏻♀️
What if they are actually what we need from our own self? What if the discontent is in us?
A person can speak in ALL FIVE love languages and we may still not feel it. Things can go unnoticed. You could be yelling from the rooftops and they just can’t hear. You could go and find fresh shrimp for their pasta. 🍤 🍝 A special meal before they are about to embark on a trip, you excitedly prepare it. Acts of Service. And they could eat it as if it was Chef Boyardee -- which becomes a personal slight, unfolding into a big fight. 😢
A lot of what hurts us, is not personal. People who are lost, cannot fulfill the desires of another, cannot learn their love language (let alone their own). 😔
Over the years, and upon reflection (for clarity comes with age), if we are lucky we find our groove. And only when self-contentment is realized, can true love exist. The value of reconciling the past, and facing our traumas. Some of us are lucky enough to do so in this lifetime. And one day we actually meet our more authentic selves, loving who we see. And then, loving who we love. Warts and all. 🥰
Giving that inner child what was once needed, closes the emotional gap that for years, has propelled us forward.
Only self-love leads to other loves. Including being part of a good relationship, where you can not only learn another’s love language -- sibling, friend, parent, lover, child -- but also try to speak it. Figuring it out, and showing it -- on a two way street -- is that sweet little spot of magic. 💫
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