The roads we travel are not always smooth -- with speed bumps & yield signs we proceed with caution. And as my husband and I teach our teens how to drive, I am reminded of marriage. Seatbelts on, mirrors adjusted, we too learn. 🚙
Having just celebrated 23 years, here are some thoughts:
1. We were never meant to stay the same. Nor are our relationships. Marriage in Year 1 is not like it is in Year 20. The changes life brings, apply to marriage too.
2. Reach out, lean on those you trust. People assume you are OK unless you tell them -- a pretty picture on social media means nothing. True, not everyone wants you to succeed. Not everyone wants you to fail either.
3. Love your partner’s family, they are your family too. Make an effort, even when it is hard. Walking away hurts more -- your partner loves them, and will love you for it.
4. We all need time to ourselves. Take it, use it. When we give, give, give, we cannot maintain it. Resentment builds up.
5. No one person can be your everything. Seek out friends. Together, and independently. We are put together from all the people in our lives -- and we need a support team.
6. Go for coffee. Share what’s on your mind. Let things go when you can. Others, they grow into something else -- because they don’t magically disappear. Confront what you’re scared to confront, even when it is hard. We can do hard -- going through the motions, serves no one.
7. Forgive. And apologize. None of us is perfect. We bring baggage into every relationship. Remembering that, helps.
8 Never stop working on yourself. Learn new things. Grow -- both in & out of the relationship. A whole person can love fully.
9. Marriages have waves -- taking us to the most unexpected of places. And it’s OK. We stumble. But we get back up. Where there is authenticity, we get back up.
10. Have fun, whatever that is. There will always be stress & problems. Remember what brought you together -- for life can change on a dime. Relationships can too.
None of this is earth shattering. But going into marriage, I knew very little. When we learn, with no ego, our growth keeps us moving forward.
Far from being an expert on much, this I know. ❤️
@mojosheth...It truly is one to learn from. Every year. Congrats to you both. It is a (worthwhile) job in and of itself, to keep it going, in the right ways. xo
I love you both.. sometimes we fall into a pattern and don’t appreciate what we have. Thank you for being so candid and sharing some advice. Our 15 year is next week… no matter what year it is, every year is an accomplishment and one to learn from